Still Lost…Need Flashlight.

I’m dying here…

I am typing, ever…so…slowly, with my left hand. And my left hand only. This not because my right hand is off doing something fun and squishy. No, it’s wrapped in a splint and kinesiotape, and elevated on a pad on my desk. I am forced to hunt and pack, southpaw-style, because my righty hurts so much that even thinking about using it makes it swell up. And I suck at this left-handed stuff.

(see, that took twenty minutes to type, especially the word “squishy.”)

My impatience with my situation knows no bounds. I’m lost without my pen or keyboard for comfort. I can’t write about how it feels to have your voice splinted out of commission; how the pain makes me crazy and evil and wish for dark, poisonous things.

I can’t even tell you silly bits like how much, to my utter surprise, I loved Anchorman; I can’t tell you about Cthulhu the Chihuahua; I can’t tell you about my fears and joys in meeting the gals at The Midwest Fatso Gabster Retreat; I cant tell you how wonderful my Derek has been throughout my little ordeal, though this should be a surprise to no one.

But, I’ll get my hand back, someday, I will. And I get to see Maryland, soon, on the company’s dime. And I have love, if not total health, and great cats and a sweet face…and strength.


Thanks for weathering a moment of weakness with me. I’ll be okay.


  1. Mavis says:

    Oh honey. Owee ow. Thanks for putting yourself through the frustration of one handed typing to tell us about it. (I am really paying attention to my typing now, and appreciating that I have all ten fingers at my disposal.
    Tuesday night, right? Still on? I’ll be traveling this weekend, but call anyway, I have my mobile.
    Can’t wait!

  2. john says:

    useless factoid of the day: stewardesses is the longest word to be typed with only your left hand.

    get well soon!

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